April 20, 2013

Finest Hour 153, Winter 2011-12

Page 49

Churchill as a literary Character (4) / Do Not Read at Your Early Convenience

Churchill’s Secret Agent, by Max and Linda Ciampoli. Berkely, softbound, 496 pp., $9.95. Portrayal ★ Worth Reading

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By Michael McMenamin


The Churchill Centre’s former webmaster, Dave Turrell, had a talent for words. Posting reviews of two of the decade’s most appalling critiques, he deployed the subtitle, “We Read Them So You Don’t Have To.” Well, do we have one that you don’t have to read. In fact, we encourage you to not read it at your earliest convenience.

The Ciampolis’ book, which starts with a Churchill quote he never made (“Never, never, never quit”), purports to be “a novel based on a true story”: Churchill, were are told, recruited Max Ciampoli to be his “secret agent.” By the way, they conversed only in French. Soon we are told that Churchill sometimes “nods off while writing.” This must have been quite a sight, since much of Churchill’s writing was done at his stand-up desk.

Did you know that there were direct flights from Casablanca to England? That’s how Max got to Britain on his first mission. I’ve sent an urgent message to Rick to get Ilsa and Lazlo on that flight—not the one to Lisbon.

The rest is just as bad and involves Churchill personally giving Max all his assignments, debriefing him after each (all in French). Along the way, Max meets the Pope and learns that U.S. Ambassador Joe Kennedy has been in touch with “several American industrialists asking them to manufacture arms, ammunition and airplanes for Germany…. [to] be paid in gold and jewels gathered from the pillage of Europe [which] is being held in safety in South America.”

FH reviewed this book because some of our readers inquired about it The editor has refused to release your names but you know who you are. In the future, please show more restraint.

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